In my case, it was a simple phone call.
I saw a strange sequence of numbers come up on my phone and the only reason I didn't silence it was because I caught a glimpse of the word underneath the numbers...Guinea.
It was my son calling! My heart skipped a beat.
But, by the time I clicked on the accept button, the call ended. It wasn't long before a voicemail came up.
Just hearing his voice, loud and clear, coming through the speaker was incredible. I laughed and I cried at the same time.
Relief.
Joy.
Love.
I had been waiting days to hear him.
Almost two weeks with no word.
He was leaving instructions on how to go online and add minutes to the phone the Peace Corps had given him. He told us not to call him as the charges would be astronomical. But if we add minutes to his phone, he can call us. Maybe once a week or once every two weeks.
Needless to say, I immediately went to the site he told me about and added the most I could.
I had no idea how much time that would give us. But I just wanted him to call back!
Within a half an hour the phone rang again.
All these days and nights of worry melted away when he said, 'Hi, Mom!'
I ran to get Ed and I put Brax on speaker phone so we could hear what he had to say.
We only asked a few questions and he was off and running.
So much to tell us about his new life.
And, boy, is it ever a NEW life. Nothing is the same as the life he knew.
As I listened, I realized that my mind was spinning but my heart was mending.
To hear him so excited and hopeful about what he would be able to learn and, in return, to teach these people on another continent--well, it's exactly what I had hoped to hear.
The quiet resolve was still in his voice. The immense changes haven't dulled his overall goal. He is there to serve and to help. I couldn't have been more pleased.
He spoke of deplorable living conditions, unspeakable abuses against both humans and animals, unimaginable health challenges, and lack of basic American comforts.
While I realized I would have never had the strength to do what he's undertaking, I was so grateful to hear him say he is totally immersing himself in the culture and is blessed with the family who has adopted him for the next 27 months.
He told us he feels safe and isn't fearful of his surroundings or of the community where he is living and will be working.
With each word, my heart felt better.
And better.
A heart healing.
No matter where our children find themselves, we only want the best for them.
We want them safe.
We want them happy.
While I would not have chosen this path for my oldest son, I am truly ashamed I never thought about how what I want for him is what the families he will be working with want for their children. The Peace Corps is such a natural fit for Braxton. How did I not see it before? I've been so consumed with my missing him and the thought of him being gone for so long.
It took my son to show me that we have a very short time on this earth and it is our duty to share our blessings with others.
It's only been two weeks since he's been gone and he's already taught me that we are all humans with the same basic wants and needs. I'll do anything I can to support him these next few years as he fights for others.
It's no longer about missing my son.
It's about sharing him.
He belongs to Guinea for now.
This is how a mom's heart begins to heal.
It is what it is.
p
