We walked out of the
nursing home and stood in front of Ed's truck.
The funeral home was on
its way.
We didn't say anything for
a few minutes and then Ed looked at me.
“What are we going to do
now?” he asked.
I saw Janet before I
actually met her. The Turner Junior High gym. I was a cheerleader
and she was that cute boy Eddie Stewart's mom. It was a basketball
game and I was 12 or 13 years old.
There was no way I could
have known, nearly 40 years later, the woman sitting on those
bleachers would become such an integral part of my life.
I think Ed and I might
have been in college when we were talking about our parents. Don't
know what started that conversation, but, what sticks out is that I
said something about how I had always told my parents how much I
loved them and they would say the same to me—everyday--sometimes
multiple times a day.
I can still see Ed's face,
illuminated by his car's headlights, as we were heading down the back
road from Floyd & Janet's house in Arcadia to Jacksonville.
He was looking straight
ahead and said, “I've never told my mom I love her.”
I remember being shocked.
That concept seemed so odd to me because I could clearly see how much
they cared about each other.
I asked him why not?
He said, simply, “She knows.”
I told him to turn the car
around.
We went back to their
house and Janet was sitting at the kitchen table. She looked
surprised we were back so soon.
We sat down and Ed said he
just wanted to tell her something.
You should have seen
her smile.
She quickly said, “I
love you, too.”
From that moment on, the
“I love you's” became more frequent.
You see, the thing about
Janet and Ed's relationship is that they would do absolutely anything
for each other.
That was the unspoken
part.
But, that night, I think
they both understood how important the spoken word was,
too.
As outgoing as Janet was,
Ed is equally as quiet.
Opposites?
No. He's his mother's
son.
They have the kindest
hearts. Caring. Compassionate.
They just expressed it
differently.
But, both loved their
families more than anything else in the world.
Janet was a natural
caregiver. She'd done it all her life...for so many people she
loved.
And, when
she
was the one who needed the care, Ed was there.
Unwavering. Supportive.
Selfless.
She once told him, during
these last months, that she knew he would make the right decisions
for her—that she had complete trust in him.
That. Is. Love.
Perhaps the only people
who Janet loved more than her son, were his children.
God, she was proud of
them. Typical Grandma style.
Or, in the case of these
four...Monger style.
When Braxton was little,
he had constant ear infections. Dr. Dailey would tell us that
everything sounded like it was underwater. So, when we would call
Janet “Grandma” apparently, it sounded like Monger to him.
It stuck.
Our kids started out with
three Mongers. Monger Ruby, Monger Lin, and Monger Janet.
About 15 years ago, Monger
Janet was the only Monger they had left.
One grandparent.
As their mom, I'll be
forever grateful for the love and support she gave to them. Our Four 'B's, as she would call them.
Too many times, too many
memories to share. But they hold those in their heart now. That's
where they'll stay.
We couldn't have asked for
more.
“What are we going to do
now?”
It's been a long, long
time since I first saw Janet.
That cute boy, Eddie
Stewart, became the love of my life. And his mom became more than the
woman in those bleachers in the Turner Junior High gym.
She was my mother in law,
my kids' Monger Janet, and in these past months, she became my
friend.
I'm going to miss her.
It is what it is.
p
